Yesterday was such an AMAZING day. For two reasons. One, becuase sleeping in my own bed felt so good, and my mom and I are back to normal. We had a ‘family night’ last night and stayed up for movies and board games just like the good ol’ days. The last time I beat my dad in Monopoly must have been a good 3 years ago, but I think his age is getting the best of him because I beat him twice out of the three rounds that we went. I also got the news from Bruno that he got alot of positive feedback from his show and was asked to perform again in Jacksonville the weekend after my birthday. He said something about wanting me to come along but we decided to just talk about it later. Last night I spent a good 20 minutes trying to guess what this ‘surprise’ he had for me was. It HAD to be a souvenier because I can’t think of anything else it could possibly be. We’ll see though.
My flight was scheduled to arrive today at about 4:00pm in Honolulu. I was not looking forward to flying again but I guess I should get used to it trying to be a singer. I can’t figure out how to really do my hair. Im not used to having to even touch it, hopefully my mom or Karmin can figure this shit out because this isn’t going to work. I guess she got her Mom to agree on dinner and a fresh start sometime this week which I’m exited for because I honestly didn’t want to have to be in a ‘secret relashionship’
“Brunito!” I heard my mom yell from a distance. I looked to my right to find her waving me down at baggage claim. “Hey momma!” I said as I hugged her. “Well what is this?” I almost forgot what she was talking about until she rubbed the top of my head. “Oh! yeah, Surpriiiiise!” I said with a cheesy smile. She laughed and rubbed my back as I pulled my suitcase from the belt. “You look handsome honey. Same hair as when you were 3 you remember? Looking just like your father.” “Yeah, dont remind me.” I said shaking my head and smiling. She laughed and we made our way to the car.
“So you know sweety, Tahiti and Kailani really want you to come to Los Angeles with them, they have an extra room and everything.” “I know mom, but I just dont want to be a burden on them.” “Bruno how will you be a burden on your own sisters? They want you to succeed and are helping you by giving you a place to stay. This is your dream. Don’t pass it up, just think about it okay?” I nodded my head and looked out the window. She was right, my sisters moved to LA about a year ago to work on a business of their own and for the last 3 months they’ve been hounding me to come live with them and try to get a record deal. I’ve thought about it but always pushed it to the back of my head.
“Hello?” “Hey hey hey pretty lady, guess who’s home?” I smiled and shut my door behind me and jumped on my bed.” “Little guy, about 2 inches taller than me, big afro and beautiful brown eyes, I think he goes by Peter?” “WRONG!” He said in a raspy voice. I laughed and rolled onto my stomach. “I missed you!” “I missed you more..” “I don’t think so Bru.” “I know so. How about Sandy’s? Me, you and some leftover spaghetti my mom made, I gaurantee its’ the best spaghetti you will ever taste. “Sounds good, meet you there in..?” “Give me 20 minutes.” “K. Love you.” “Love you too babe.” I wasn’t sure if I was going to get in the water or not so I just threw on a hot pink bikini top and pink and yellow polka dotted bottoms underneath a bathing suit cover. I left my hair down and pulled it back with a headband and was out the door in 15 minutes. “Mom I’m going to the beach, I’ll be back later!” I hollared from the front door. “Okay!” She yelled back.
I got to the beach before Bruno so I laid out my towel and played with my phone for a little bit. A few minutes passed and I looked up to see If I saw Bruno but I didn’t. I only saw some short guy from a distance but it wasn’t him. This guy had short hair. I looked back at my phone for a second smiling at a random text message Naomi sent me. “Waiting for someone?” “Yeah my boyf- Bruno?!” I looked up and he just smiled and held his hand out to help me get up. “Oh my gosh babe! Your hair!!” He turned in a complete circle and did a funny dance.” “Sooooo?” “I love it!” I honestly did. He looked so good. The front was kind of curled back and it was longer than the rest of his hair. The sides had a little more taken off. “He put down his towel and the bowl of spaghetti and brought me into his arms and held me tight. I layed my head on his shoulder and just took in his scent. “I missed you so much Bru.” He let go of me and just looked into my eyes. “You look beautiful.” “Thank you.” I loved when he said little things like that, especially because my hair was a day old and I had not an ounce of makeup on.
I layed out my towel next to hers and we both sat down. “So you really like my hair or are you just saying that?” She looked at me and ruffled the top of it. “I love it, its like, Elvis Presley meets Johnny Bravo.” I shot her a look. “Johnny Bravo really? That’s hurtful.” She laughed at me and rubbed my arm. “Yeah a very sexy and modern Johnny Bravo.” I smiled and kissed her forhead. “Okay so where’s the spaghetti I’m STARVING.”
He pulled out a tupperware bowl and two forks. I thought it was cute how we were sharing. “Okay open up.” I let out a light laugh and opened my mouth. “Ahhhh” I said as I held it open. “Bruno.” I said with a full mouth. “It’s cold!” “Um duh, that’s when spaghetti is good, when it’s cold, who raised you?!” I laughed again almost spitting my food out this time. I love his sense of humor. He turns the littlest moments into some of the best. Bru ended up eating most of the spaghetti leaving me about 5 bites. “Lets get in.” I said looking over to the water. “I didn’t brink my trunks.” “So, no one comes at this time.” I said as I tugged on his shirt. “Boxers will do.” “What if I’m not wearing any?” “Bru shut up and strip down!” I said laughing at him.
I loved her reaction every time I joked around with her. Some of the faces she made are priceless. She turned around and pulled her top over her head revealing her more than perfect body. “What are you lookin at Bru?” She said catching me staring her down. “What I can’t look at my girlfriend.” “You’re gonna have to catch her first!” She said running into the water. I quickly pulled my jeans down after taking my shoes off and pulled my shirt off right before running into the water. “Caught her!” I yelled as I grabbed her from behind. She laughed and turned around as she wrapped her arms around my neck.
The sky was almost purple as the sun set and the moon began to shine. The temperature was perfect and a light breeze hit the both of us. He rested his chin on top of my head and I my moved my arms just beneath his armpits and hugged him tighter. “Can you promise me something?” “Anything.” I said looking up at him. “Never ever ever ever-” “Ever what Bru?!” I replied laughing. “Leave me for doing this.” Before I could even respond he let go of me and started splashing water into my face. I tried splashing back but he went underwater and I couldnt find him. I looked around for a second and out of nowhere I felt him underneath me lifting me up onto his neck. “Well looks like I won that battle..” He said
These were the moments that I wanted to last forever…
I slid down a little bit so that my legs were wrapped around his waist but I was still on his back. I put my arms around his neck and rested my chin on his shoulder. He walked a little further into the ocean until the water was just at his chest, still holding onto my thighs. “So what do you want for your birthday?” He asked me looking out into the water. “Umm..I don’t know.” “Ahhh come on there’s gotta be something that you want. You’re probably picturing it right now.” I laughed because he was so right. “A song..” I said quietly. “From me?” “No from Barney, of course you Bru!” He laughed a little bit and shook his head. “You’re just asking for a wrestling match with all that sarcasm huh?” “You don’t want to see me Bru, I’ve been preparing while you were gone.” He turned his head as much as he could giving me a ‘you’re such a damn lie’ look out of the corner of his eye. I kissed the side of his head and smiled.
“Well I had a good time tonight.” I said pulling my shirt over my head . “Me too.” she said smiling. “And the spaghetti, delish!” “I told you! Wait till you taste her Chicken Eggrolls, my mom’s the shit, I’m telling you!” She laughed and slipped on her flip flops as she grabbed her towel and shook it out. I didn’t want this night to end at all. “Ready?” She asked holding her hand out for me to grab it. I wrapped my hand around hers and intertwined our fingers.
“Alright baby, I’ll see you-” “Tommorow.” I interrupted. “Dinner with my parents remember?” “Right.” He said pulling me in for a hug. I loved the way he looked at me right before he was going to kiss me and before I knew it our lips met. He slid his tongue into my mouth and held my cheeks with both of his hands. Before he let go he kissed me two more times quickly. “Okay I’m done.” He said smiling. He leaned in for one more kiss and made an obnoxious kissy noise this time. “Really Bruno!?” He laughed and stepped down from the doorstep. “Goonight Karmin.” “Night Bru.”
Dinner the other night was a success. Even though my parents practically interrogated Bruno with questions one after another, I could tell that they really like him. He was a little nervous at first but he ended up opening up and even sang a little bit of ‘Billie Jean’ to prove to my dad that he could sing. For the last few days I’ve been at the beach all day long. I find it hard to keep myself busy being out of school and all. Last night I went over to Bruno’s and watched a movie with him, his mom and Presley. Even though it wasn’t my first time meeting his mom, it was the first time meeting her as his girlfriend which was awkward but I really like her. She showed me tons of pictures of Bruno when he was little. He was the cutest baby ever.
“Bru? Are you awake?” I heard my sister say from the other side of my door. “Yeah come in!” I hollered as I sat up in my bed. She walked in and looked around for a second before she sat down at the edge of my bed. “Brunito, I can’t keep doing this.” “Doing what Pres?” “Keeping your secrets, you have to tell her.” I felt my throat close up at the thought of telling Karmin the truth. Everything felt fine before she brought it up. “How am I supposed to say it without hurting her?” “You can’t, I don’t know why you kept this going on in the first place. I told you from the beginning.” “I know Presley, I know.” “Look Bru don’t have an attitude with me, you’re the one that dug yourself into this hole so it’s your job to get yourself out.” She was right but I couldn’t admit it. I just sat the there looking away from her. “Look how happy she was last night, are you really going to keep these things from her?” “Alright, I’ll tell her, I’ll tell her today.” “Okay, you better..” As much as I wish I could just ignore this I had to tell Karmin. There was no way I could look at her and see how happy she is knowing in the back of my mind that I’ve been lying to her about something this serious. I just hope that she won’t leave me..
“I’ll be right back guys, it’s Bru.” I said walking away to a spot where I could hear him. “Hello?” “Hey, are you busy?” “No, not really, just at Naomi’s with some friends. What’s up?” “Nothin I just wanted to see if I could pick you up for a few minutes and talk.” I walked further away from the group of girls and plugged my ear with one finger trying to hear better. “Talk about what? Is everything okay?” “Yeah everything is fine, well kind of. I’d just rather talk in person.” He sounded different. I couldn’t pinpoint what exactly it was but he was making me nervous. I hate bad news. “I’m gonna step out for like 30 minutes, Bruno needs to talk.” “Is everything okay?” Naomi asked looking up from her phone. “I guess, I don’t know, I’ll tell you everything later.”
I never actually thought I would be having to tell her this. I’m such a fuck up. I saw her walk out of Naomi’s house and towards my car. Of course she looked good as hell which would make this even harder for me. I had no idea what was about to go down. “Hey babe.” She said climbing into the car. “Hey..” “What’s wrong?” Shit. I wish I could act like none of this is happening right now. I put the car back into drive and began talking. “Before I tell you this, I just want to remind you that I love you, so much.” “I love you too Bru, what is it?” Hearing her say that didn’t help at all. Why am I so stupid? Why would I jeopardize something as good as having her in my life? Fuck. “Okay well, first off, I’m sorry.” “For what?” “For everything you’re about to hear.” “Okay, so tell me..” I swallowed and took a deep breath as I turned the corner to a street that looked like a dead end. “I lied about Carla, I’ve seen her a few times..”
I looked down at my shoes trying to gather my thoughts. “While we’ve been together?” I asked him. He nodded his head yes. I just kept looking away “That’s not it though babe..” I shook my head not even wanting to know the rest. He put his hand on my thigh trying to comfort me but It wasn’t working. “She thinks that she might be pregnant…”
She didn’t say anything, nothing at all. Her face was buried into her hands as she sat there silently. I stopped the car at the end of the street and took my seat belt off. “Can you say something?” I said quietly. I really didn’t know how to handle this. “What the fuck is wrong with you Bruno..” “I know Karmin, I don’t know, please just please let me explain.” “Explain it then because I’m really not understanding how you would have any type of reasonable excuse for this bullshit!” I could see her eyes starting to well up and a tear fell from her face. I tried to reach over and wipe it but she moved away. “Don’t.” “Baby, please..” “I can’t do this Bruno, I can’t, at all.”
It hurt me to say that to him, but it would hurt worse to let myself go through this. “Please don’t say that babe, I’m so, so sorry.” “Why would you even tell me that you love me.” “Because I mean it, I love you so much Karmin. You are the best thing that’s happened to me in a long time and as bad I screwed this up I hope that you can forgive me.” “Forgive a guy that tells me he loves me and then cheats on me and gets a girl pregnant? I don’t think so..” “It’s not for sure yet..” I looked out the window and bit my nail as I just let the tears fall down my face. “Please don’t cry Karmin. I’ll make this up to you I swear.” “Do you remember the night that you promised me you would never break my heart?” He nodded his head. “What happened to that guy, what happened Bruno?” “He’s still here Karmin, I don’t love her, I love you.” “Just tell me why then, why did you have sex with her, what does she have that I can’t give you?” “Nothing, nothing at all, you’re everything that she isn’t, you’re perfect.” He said as he ran his fingers through my hair. My tears began to fall faster and I felt like my heart was going to pound out of my chest. If this was any other guy I would have already been out of the car and done with him, but I don’t know what is holding me back.
“Karmin listen to me.” I took her hand in mind and looked back and forth between her eyes. “I love you, and everything you are, I was stupid as hell to mess this up and to break your heart, especially after it already being broken once. But if you give me another chance I won’t fuck it up.” I meant every single word I was saying, but I couldn’t tell if she knew that or not. “Please Karmin, don’t leave me..I love you so fuckin much.”
My phone rang and we both looked down to it. “Its her isn’t it?” Karmin asked me. “Yeah…” “Answer it.” I really didn’t want to. “Let me hear you tell her everything, Bru, if she means nothing to you then prove it.” I picked up my phone and answered it and Karmin looked away as she listened to me. I told Carla everything and I made sure she knew that we wouldn’t be seeing eachother again. “Done.” I said hanging up the phone.
In the back if my mind I thought that I would be stupid for forgiving him, but seeing the hurt in his eyes assured me that he meant what he said. “I know I hurt you Karmin and i’m sorry, but I really need you right now, I can’t have a baby, not right now and especially not with her.” Well you shouldn’t have fucked her then. I thought to myself, but I didn’t say it. I couldn’t.
After sitting in the car for what seemed like another 30 minutes we headed over to Bruno’s house to talk for a little while longer. He kept apologizing over and over and told me about 8 times how much he loved me. I don’t know how I was going to get through this.
“Do you need anything? Are you thirsty?” “I’m fine Bru..” “Okay, just let me know.” It was kind of cute how he was trying so hard to make things right. I haven’t fully forgiven him yet but I was trying to think about other things. We sat on the couch awkwardly and tried to watch TV but neither of us could fully focus. My phone vibrated in my pocket. I pulled it out and saw a text from Naomi.
’Yeah, don’t wait up for me, I’ll call you later k?”
I shoved my phone back into my pocket and got comfortable on the couch. “Come here.” Bruno said reaching his arm out for me. I was still mad at him, but I couldn’t say no to being in his arms. I laid my head on his lap and stretched my legs out over the arm of the couch. “You like this show?” He asked. I looked over at the TV and then back at him. “Kind of, I don’t understand it sometimes.” He focused on the TV and I just stared at him. “Bru..” “Yeah?” “You don’t have to do this..” “Do what?” “Pretend you’re okay, we’re both hurting, and we need to talk about it.” I was waiting for a response but instead he lifted my head and got up from the couch. I sat up on my elbows and watched him start to unzip his jacket. He let it fall from his arms and crawled on top of me.
“What are you doing Bru?” I needed her more than ever right now.
“I just need…to show you..how much I really do..love you..” I told her in between kisses. She kissed me back, but it wasn’t the same. I could feel that she was holding back from me and that she was hurting. I couldn’t be mad though. I’m the dumbass who messed up. “Bru..” She said softly. I ignored her and continued to kiss her moving down to her neck. She let out a soft moan as I ran my tongue up and down her neck and jawline.
“Bruno.” I said sternly. “What?” I slid my way up from underneath him and leaned against the arm of the couch. “No..” I said fixing myself. He looked down and scratched the back of his head as he turned to face the TV. Between the thought of him possibly having a baby and him lying to me, I just wasn’t feeling it. “Okay, im sorry.” He said making no eye contact with me still. “Bru, I just can’t do it, not like this, with everything going on I can’t pretend like everything’s okay. “I know..” We sat in silence for the next almost 5 minutes. I was pretending to watch tv and his eyes wondered throughout the room. I was really just trying to figure out what to say next. For the first time I felt kind of awkward and out of place near Bruno and I didn’t like it at all.
“I think I kind of just want to go home Bru..” I said quietly breaking the silence. “Please don’t.” He asked. His words were broken up. He cleared his throat and looked over to me. I tilted my head and looked at him while taking a deep breath. “We can just watch a movie or something, anything you want, but I need you right now, here with me.” He seemed really sad and I could see the guilt in his eyes. I crawled into his arms and we began watching some random movie that I let him pick out. I fought for several minutes trying to stay awake but eventually fell asleep to Bruno squeezing me gently and stroking my arm with his fingers.
I woke up forgetting for a second that I even fell asleep. I looked down to Karmin who was still in my arms wrapped up in a blanket. I moved her hair out of my face and laughed a little bit at her snoring lightly. I had to pee but I just held it so I didn’t wake her up. I laid my head on hers and watched the rest of the movie that we fell asleep on. About 25 minutes later I felt her take a deep breath and she slowly opened her eyes. “Hey sleepyhead.” I said touching her nose. She smiled and looked around and then back at me. “How long have you been awake?” “Like a half hour.” “Why didn’t you wake me up?” “Cause, you were snoring so I figured you must have been tired.” Her face turned red and her eyes widened a little. “What?” I asked laughing. “That’s so embarrassing.” I leaned down and kissed her on her forehead. “It doesn’t have to be babe, I love you.. snoring and all.”
“Thanks Bru..” I really liked how he was being sweet and everything, but it wasn’t going to change the fact that I was still really mad at him. Honestly he’s really lucky for me to even stick around, but I loved him. “So what do you want to do for the rest of the day?” “Umm, we can watch another movie.” I said smiling at him. “Okay but you HAVE to stay awake this time!” He answered already on his way to the TV.
“Wait I’m confused.” Karmin said looking up to me. “They’re brother and sister but-” I was interrupted by the doorbell. Me and Karmin both looked at the door and then back at each other. “Can you pause that babe.” I said sitting up. “Who is it?” I hollered on my way. “Its me!” Who the fuck is ‘me’ I thought to myself. I opened the door to find the last person that I wanted to see standing there.
I peeked at the door trying not to be obvious when I heard a girls voice. “Can we talk Bruno, please?” Oh hell no, not this hoe..