I don’t know if I really want to watch the video anymore, I don’t think I need Bruno to prove anything to me. But I think it’s the right thing to do……And because I’m a curious fucker like that. I wait for Bruno to meet me inside and I open the door to the CCTV room. Here we go. The tape is still stopped in the exact same place that I left it in. I press play and we watch……
But, wait. Nothing happens. He’s not even looking at her! A huge smile creeps up on my face and I watch Bruno stop her and run out the room. “Told you nothing happened” He says as he rubs my shoulders. “I’m so so so sorry Lex and I’m not asking you to forgive me, I’m just asking for another chance, I love you” “I know you do” but this time I don’t kiss him, I just take his hand and walk out of the room. “What!? No kiss?” “Nope, you need to suffer, in fact. No touching me either” and I let go of his hand “Until when!?” “Until I say so Mr, you got a problem with that?” “No ma’am” and he salutes. God he’s so damn cute. We walk back in to the room and I see Keisha from the Sugababes, I’ve missed this girl “Hey Lex!!” “Hey Keisha!” “Wow, it’s been so long! How are you?” “I’m great, you?” “Amazing! God, it’s been so damn long! Wait, what are you doing here? This is random” “I came to visit my boyfriend” “Wait. You’re not dating one of the Smeezingtons are you!?” “Who the fuck are the Smeezingtons!?” I see Bruno, Phil and Ari laughing their asses off in the corner. Bruno try’s to form a sentence whilst laughing like a fool “We…we’re….we’re the smeez…..Smeezingtons!!!….” “Uhhh, that’s the best ya’ll could come up with!? THE FUCK!” Ari calms himself and says “Well, it’s kinda like a play of off a smash, a smeeze and it just went on from there I suppose” “Great. I’m dating a Smeezi-what?” “Hey, don’t hate on the Smeezingtons” and they all cross their arms like gangsters. Wow. “Uhhh yeah Keisha, I am dating one of those whatever” Bruno shouts over “S-M-E-E-Z-I-N-G-T-O-N” “Awesome! Which one?” “Err, the hot one……” “You’re dating Phil!?” “The other hot one” “Bruno?” “That’s the one” “Daaamnn, you lucky lady, how’s Phred by the way?” “Dating” “Damn” Ahh I do love Keisha.
We spend some time together in the studio working on a few tracks. Every now and then Bruno sits a little bit closer to me but each time I just move away. Wow. I never thought of a moment when I’d be refusing to let Bruno near me. This must be true love. But I want him to feel some distance from me. I shouldn’t have gone back to him so easily, I know that was wrong, so now I’m trying to make things right. “Babyyyy, just one kiss” He whispers in my ear. I melt….but stay strong. “No” “Ok, how about if I steal a kiss like this” “Wh-“and he kisses my lips and runs across to the other side of the studio. Damn his ass! Damn his sexy ass should I say…. He comes back over and says “Sorry. Don’t leave? Please?” “I have to, I don’t want to, but I’ve got work too” “Then quit, you’ve always wanted to quit and start your own production team, and you know you’re good enough to do it on your own, you could join the Smeezingtons…..” “Erm, I’m good thanks” “Lex, just think about it” “Bruno, you know I’d love to just quit and join you guys but I can’t, not right now at least. One day I will” “One day soon?” “Yeah, pretty soon” I lied. I don’t know when I’ll actually have the balls to leave. I don’t know if I have the strength to do it on my own. I hate my life. “Hey, why do you two look so depressed?” Keisha asks. “Lex has to leave tonight” Bruno says. “Actually, I leave in 4 hours” “Really!? Fuck! Baby don’t go” “I told you. I can’t, now let’s move on” “Well, if Lexii can’t stay, and then Bruno, why don’t you go with her back home?” “I can’t, I gotta stay here and work with ya’ll” “We’ll be fine!” “Seriously!? Phil, Ari, what do you say?” “Bro it’s cool, you’re no fun when you’re depressed like this anyway” Fuck! Is this really happening, is Bruno really gonna be able to come back with me!? “Keisha are you sure!?” “Yes I’m sure!! I owe you this anyway. Now take your man back home with you!” I get up and give her the biggest hug ever!! Yaaaaaaaayyy!! I get to bring him back home with me!! :D Bruno comes up to me and I lean in to ki-“Ahh don’t kiss me!” “Shut up Lex” and he grabs me and kisses me anyway. Damn. “Lex, make sure that Bruno isn’t seen by Jacques ok? I’ll happily lie for you over here and tell him that he’s working with us, but if he finds out that Bruno didn’t stay, well, you know, it won’t be good for the both of you” “I really do owe you Keisha” “Yeah, well, you just let me know if Phred ever becomes single” “You got it” and I take Bruno and leave for L.A. Together.
I manage to sleep through the entire plane ride home, Lord knows what Bruno was doing the entire 9 hour ride home, I’d rather not think about it though to be honest, if I asked him he’s probably say something like “Watching you sleep”. Fuck it, I ask him anyway during the taxi ride home. “Baby, what did you do the whole flight?” “I watched you sleep” I knew it. “Nahh, I’m just kidding, well, I’m not, I did watch you for a while, then I just worked on some new music” “You never stop do you?” “Never” “You gotta let me hear some of that stuff soon” “Of course, I mean it’s all about you anyway” Shit, that thought creeps me out. “All of them?” “Well, I have written a song about doing nothing, but it’s not finished yet” “What you gonna call it?” “Who knows? The Lazy Song maybe?” “Hmmm creative….” “That’s just what I do!” “Bruno you make no sense!” “You love it” and I do.
We get back home to mine and I feel so much better. I go and flop on the couch and close my eyes. Wait. Where’s Bruno? I get up and find him standing in the hallway “Baby, why aren’t you coming inside?” “I was just thinking about something, how about if I unpacked here?” “Well, then all your stuff would be here” “What if I wanted all my stuff to be here?” “Well you’d just be going back and forth all the time and it’d be pointless….” He just looks at me like I’m missing something, what coul-FUCK! HOLY FUCK IS HE SAYING WHAT I THINK HE’S SAYING!? “Bruno, say it” “Lex, can I move in with you? And never have to leave your side again?” “Yes” I say with a huge smile as he leans in for a kiss, he pulls away and says “Will you marry me as well?” “Shut up, one thing at a time” and I lean in again. Bruno lifts me up, bridal style let me add and says “Now let’s go up to our bedroom” I couldn’t be happier than I am at this moment. Bruno takes us both upstairs and literally throws me on the bed! “Ouch!” “Lex. That didn’t hurt, I threw you on a bed” “On OUR bed” “Yeah, our bed” and he lies down next to me. He takes my hand and plays with my fingers whilst in deep thought. “Baby what are you thinking of?” “Isn’t that what I usually say to you?” “Answer me” Bruno rolls over so he’s pining me down on the bed. Not that I’m complaining or anything. He looks me deep in the eyes and says “I wanna take you back home” “What?” “Back home to Hawaii, to meet my family, to show you about where I grew up and show you more about me” WHAT!? Where is this coming from? What if they don’t like me? Oh Fuck “Well, I mean if you don’t wanna go….” “No! It’s not that, it’s just, will they like me?” “Baby, they’ll love you, and my sisters will love you if you bring all your shoes with you too” “Uhhhh” “Baby, please, I want them all to meet you” and he starts to kiss my neck and I let him. Bad idea because I completely melt. “Hmph, well, Ok…..” “Thank you baby” he says against my neck.
Meeting Bruno’s family, this should be interesting…….
I wake up in Bruno’s arms and I realise that I’m going to be waking up like this for the rest of my life. Perfect. I just lay there and start smiling to myself and about how happy I actually am whilst he sleeps. After a while I decide to get up, I jump in the shower and throw some old sweats on and go downstairs. My house is filthy. Well, not filthy, but by my standards it is, I decide to clean before Bruno wakes up. How is it that all of Bruno’s clothes are just thrown everywhere!? It’s not even like we had sex downstairs or anything, he just throws his stuff anywhere, damn he’s messy. After I finish cleaning the entire bottom floor it’s 1pm and Bruno should be up soon. So I decide to wait till he’s up to make breakfast. My Phone rings and it’s Mid. I miss her. “Hey Mid” “Hey Lex! How’re you? I kinda heard about everything from Phred who found out from Phil, but everything’s ok now yeah?” “Yeah, well, I guess. Oh I don’t know” “Lex, talk it out, is he there? He always is….” “Yeah he decided to move in last night, hold on” I go outside by the pool where I know Bruno won’t be able to hear me, light up a cigarette and pour my heart out over the phone. “What don’t you know about? You still love him right?” “Of course I do, you know I do” “Then what’s bothering do, do you think he’ll do it again?” “No, I know he won’t, but, it’s just, I wish I hadn’t had been able to had gone back to him so easily. I mean it was like, he did it, I found out, we argued, I cried my heart out, then the next thing I know we’re having make up sex and I didn’t want that! I didn’t want to go back to him like that, I wanted him to hurt Mid, I’m so weak it’s unbelievable” “Awwwhh Lex, you’re not weak, you’re in love, in deep, deep love, that’s all. We both know he hurt more than you did, it must have torn him up inside once he realised. You’re still slightly pissed at him right?” “Yeah, a little bit” “Good, you should be” “Hey Mid” “mmhmm” “Uhm, he asked me to marry him….” “NO FUCKING WAYY!! AHHHHHH!!! LEX I CANT BELIEVE IT!!” “Calm yo tits woman! I said no” “Wow, you are fucking stupid” “Hahaha thanks bitch” “Why’d you say no!?” “Because, he asked me after sex….” “Oh hell no! Thank fuck you said no then” “I know right! I need something to tell my mom ehh” “Preach to that shit” “Stop talking gangster” “Sorry, so do you wanna marry him?” “Yuhuh, but I dunno, I just didn’t feel like I could say yes to him at that point, not just because it was after sex, makeup sex let me add, but something didn’t feel right, I don’t think I’m ready to get married, we haven’t even been dating for that long, urgh, he always makes things so complicated” “No, you make things complicated, and when the time is right, remember who you’re maid of honour will be…….” “Oh shit, I just remembered something, he wants to take me home with him, like, back home, to Hawaii” “And? That sounds so romantic” “No, Mid, you don’t get it, he wants me to meet his parents!” “And? Look Lex, you make big deals out of everything, they’re gonna love you, you’re such a likeable person and if his family are anything like Bruno, which they probably are, then you’ll be fine” “You’re right” “I always am, oh and we need you in the studio today, especially if you’re gonna be going to Hawaii soon or whatever” “Yeah I’ll be in later, see you then, byeeee” “Bye bitch, mwah” I look at the clock and he’s still not up, I decide to watch some TV until he gets up.
3pm and he’s still not up! THE FUCK!? I go upstairs to see what he’s still doing. Oh, he’s still asleep. He looks so adorable. Damn he likes his sleep, I realise that I need to get ready for the studio so I do, I purposely make noise to try and wake him up but he’s just snoring away. Once I’m dressed I finally decide to wake him up. I take my hand start to run it on his cheek slowly, “Bruno…..Baby wake up, its 4 o’clock” He starts to stir and he eventually opens his eyes and looks straight at me. It’s weird to think that I miss him and he’s only been upstairs sleeping. “What time is it?” He says all sleepy “4pm” “Ok, wake me up at 5…..” just as he says that my phone starts to ring. I sit on the bed and answer it. Bruno watches closely. “Hey Phred” “Hey Lex, you coming in today?” “Yeah I’m gonna be in today” “Awesome, Is Bruno with you?” “Yeah he’s here but he’s still sleeping” “Wild night last night huh?” “No, no more than usual” “Pour some water on him, that’ll wake him up” “I should ehh” “Anyway, make sure he doesn’t come to the studio today, don’t want Jac seeing him and everything, he still thinks he’s in London” “Yeah, I know” “You want your usual star bucks when you get in?” “Yes pleeeaasee” “Then hurry your but down here before it gets cold, I’m leaving now” “Yes sir” and I put the phone down. Bruno looks awake now, he looks deep in thought and says “Lex, have you and Phred, ever….” “Ew no, I mean nothing against Phred, but he’s more like my brother than anything else” “Do you think he’s ever thought about you in that way?” “Erm, in all honesty, no. I’ve never really gotten that vibe from him. He’s had chances to make moves on me, I can’t deny the fact that I’ve been vulnerable before, but each time he’s always been there as a friend, and sometimes that all you want” Bruno doesn’t look convinced. “Baby, I love you. AND I love Phred. But in two completely different ways. I wanna fuck you. I don’t wanna fuck Phred…..” “Damn straight you don’t” he says with a huge smile. “Right, I’m off to the studio, errr don’t leave the house today, just so I can judge Jac’s whereabouts. And here” I hand him my Visa; he knows exactly what it’s for. He runs his hands through his hair in frustration. “You sure you wanna go?” “Of course, it’s Hawaii!” “I feel bad using your money to buy the tickets though, but I really don’t have any of my own to use, I spent it all on your necklace” “Which I love, and I told you, money is not an issue, now when I get back home I expect to see two first class tickets booked for Hawaii” “First class!?!” “Yeah, well, I don’t like flying…” “Damn, I’ve never flown first class before, I hit the jackpot with you” he says with a wink. “urgh, GET OUT OF BED YOU LAZY ASS!! And don’t forget to make my bed either” I say as I run out the door.
Nothing interesting happens at the studio as usual. I’d have more fun if Bruno was here though. At about 6pm Jac comes in and says “Lex, can I see you in my office for a second? Now.” Oh shit. What have I done this time!? I look round at the others and they all give me the same “I don’t know why” face. Maybe it’s nothing. I enter his office and wait. “Lex, how are you?” “Fine…and you?” Like I fucking care. “Oh, I’m good, I’m just sick of people treating me like I’m an idiot” “Why, what’s happened?” “Nothing much, hey, have you spoken to that guy your fucking recently?” “His name is Bruno. And yeah I have. Why?” “Just wondering, we sent him away right? Where is he now?” “London” I say with no hesitation. “Really? So earlier as I was driving in to work I couldn’t have seen him walking out of the 7/11 with a fresh packet of cigarettes in his hand could I?” FUCK. “No” “DON’T BULSHIT ME ALEXIS!” And he slams his fist on the table. “So what Jac!? So I lied to you. GET OVER IT. You’re nothing Jac, you’re a talentless bastard who got his way to the top by sleeping with random bitches” “They why have we never fucked then ehh? You seem to fit that context well” “At least I have talent! That’s more than you can say” “Oh really? Talent? Who told you that ehh? Your new boyfriend who you’re fucking? He’s probably only fucking you for the money, face it, you’re not capable of having a true lasting relationship” “Shut the fuck up I don’t need to take this shit from you” “What you gonna do ehh? You don’t have the balls to do anything, now get out of my office you whore” Without even thinking I say the words “I quit”
“Whaaa…how can you quit!? You can’t quit!” I just watch him beg and beg. “Lex, don’t do this, we need you here, please” I lean in close to him “Sorry Jac, but I quit, I don’t need to take your bullshit anymore” I make my way to the door. “GOD DAMNIT LEXII, DONT BE SUCH A BITCH ALL THE TIME!!” That’s it. That’s fucking it. I’m done with all his criticisms. Just as I reach the door I turn around and say in a low voice “Jac. Stop being a cunt all the time.” And I leave with my head held high.
HOLY SHIT. DID I ACTUALLY QUIT!? I’m on such a fucking high right now, I race back home to tell Bruno. I run inside the house and find him pouring himself some juice and I literally jump on him, thank fuck he caught me otherwise we’d both be on the floor. “Well someone’s happy to see me” and I give him this vicious intense kiss “Woooaaahh, what was that for!? Not that I’m complaining” I just laugh. “Baby, I think you’ve lost it, but it’s ok, we’ll get you the help you need. Oh I got the tickets by the way” “For when?” Not that it really matters anymore; I’m a jobless free bitch. Oh God, I really have lost it. “Its an open ticket, so whenever there’s a flight we just get on it, it cost extra but I didn’t think you’d mind, I did it like that in case you couldn’t get time off work” Just as I’m about to tell him, the doorbell rings. “Ignore it” I say. “We can’t ignore it, theirs people at the door” “Theirs ALWAYS people at the door!” He doesn’t listen; with me still wrapped tightly around him he goes to answer the door. As soon as he does Mid and Phred burst in “Lex you told him right? Good because we quit too!” Thanks for that Mid…. “You WHAT!?” Bruno says is shock “OUCH” He dropped me on the floor. “Oh shit, sorry baby” and he helps me up. “Now explain” “Yeah, I FINALLY quit! I couldn’t take his bullshit anymore so I just quit and left. But you guys didn’t need to quit!” “Lex, it wouldn’t be the same without you there, and I’m sure when you start up your own production team theirs gonna be two nice little spots for us….” “Sure Phred, but I thought you wanted to become a musical director and leave the producing stuff” “Well, I do, but one thing at a time” “BE MINE!?” Bruno butts in. “Since when do you need a Musical Director!?” I make fun. “Well, I don’t, but one day I will, I think….” “Lex, don’t change his mind! Sure Brunz, I’ll do it” and they high five to seal the deal.
We’re all just chilling by the pool when my phone rings. Unknown number, strange. I answer it anyway. “Hello?” “Hey Lex its Flo” Flo? THE FUCK? Ohhhh Flo Rida! “Hey Flo, what’s up?” “Listen Lex, I’m in such a rut, I don’t even know what to do anymore, you’re my last hope” “Calm down, what’s up??” “My album comes out in two weeks, two motherfucking weeks. But I don’t have THE song, you know? THE song I need to put it out, I need your help, please say you’re free to get in the studio with me?” “Yeah I’m free, I mean I don’t have a studio, I kinda quit from the stereotypes earlier on today” “Thank fuck you did, that Jac was a creep. Uhhmm, what about the studio you’ve got in your house? That’s some pretty dope shit” “Sure, we can use that one” “You are a life saver Lex! I’ll come round tomorrow and we can work, bye” “Bye” He really did sound desperate. “Who was that baby?” “uhh, Flo Rida, he wants to come round tomorrow and work on a new song, or THE song for his new album. Hey! Why don’t you, Phil and Ari join us too? We can use all the help we can get” “He won’t mind?” “He’ll accept help from anyone at this stage”
It gets late and Mid and Phred leave after our little “quitting party” we just had. Me and Bruno sit by the pool just talking and reminiscing. “Ahh by the pool again” He says as he puts his arm around me. “Yeah by the pool, but last time you were drunk as fuck” “Yeah, well you were drunk too and I did just beat your ass in a round of shots” “Damn, I’ve never lost before” “Baby when it comes to drinking I Play For Keeps” “What does that even mean!?” “Never mind”. “I remember you then got up and I thought you were gonna leave and I got sad. THEN I realised that you were just taking your shirt off to get in” “Yeah and you were staring at me like you were hungry!” “I was hungry!! Hungry for sex….” “You still hungry for sex?” He says with a sly wink. “No, I’m good” he laughs and says “So what else do you remember?” “Uhhmm, I remember talking with you all night whilst sitting on the grass, I just remember talking for hours and hours” I lean my head on his shoulder and listen to his heartbeat. “I remember talking too, and how you told me so much stuff, not everything. But a lot” He’s right; there are things about my life that I haven’t told him. I’m just a private person. Oh shit, I hope he doesn’t think I’m keeping important secrets from him. When I don’t speak, he says “It’s ok though, because I know you’ll tell me when the moments right” and he’s right. I will. “I love you” I whisper in his ear and we make our way up to bed.
I wake up at 9 and let Bruno sleep in until 10. It’s so hard waking this guy up! Whatever I do he just won’t get up! “Bruno. Brunooo. Baby wake up. Brunoooo, he’s gonna be here soon. YO BRUNZ! GET YO ASS UP!” it’s like he can’t even hear me….. Ok, let me try something else then “Baby, I’m standing here naked waiting for you” “Hmmm, take a picture and show me later” WHAT THE!? That’s it, I jump on him and start shaking the bed and we both burst out laughing “Ahhh, you’re wearing clothes, you liar” “Yeah whatever, now get up!” and this time he does. We eat breakfast together, Phil and Ari both come over and we wait for Flo to come round. Eventually he finally turns up. “Hey Lex, haven’t seen you in a while, thanks so much for doing this!” “Anytime. Now let me introduce you to some people” I take him through to the studio where all the guys are “Flo, this is Ari, Phil and Bruno” I don’t tell him we’re dating because, well, why should I? And we get to work. “You know, I want something, something that’s just out there, you know? I’m thinking maybe like a pornographic song, something like that” Flo says. “Well how about a song about sex then?” Phil suggests. “Nahh, just sex has been done waay too many times, I need something fresh” “How about a song about oral sex then, you don’t hear too many songs like that these days” Bruno says.”Yeahhhhh!! Damn dude! I love it!” I’m not in this conversation; I just sit back and watch. Until my phone rings again. Great. I leave the studio to talk in peace “Hey mom” “Hey sweetheart, how are you?” and I know she’s talking about what happened in London “Yeah I’m fine” “You promise?” “Of course” “Ok baby girl, so what’s new?” “Nothing much really, except yesterday I QUIT!” “No fucking way!!” “Fuck yeah I did, and, uhm, Bruno wants to take me home with him” “Home? Like back to Hawaii!? Wow that’s a big step, are you ready for that?” “No, but he seems adamant that they’re gonna love me” “Of course they’ll love you! You weren’t the one that cheated….” “Mom!” “Sorry, but you weren’t!” she says whilst laughing, that’s good, I know she’s not bitter about anything. “Well, all I can say is have fun, I love you” “I love you too Mom, bye”. I go back outside to check on the guys, they look like they’re doing well so I don’t bother disturbing them, I lay on the couch and obviously I fall asleep……
I feel Bruno’s hands on my face, “Baby, Lex, baby wake up” I start to wake “What time is it?” “6pm” “Fuck! Why did you let me sleep for that long!?” “You looked peaceful and besides, if you sleep anymore we’re gonna miss our flight” “Oh, ok. Wait. WHAT!?” “Get uppppp!!!” He moans at me like a little child, he looks excited. Wait, what the hell did he just say!? “Where are the others?” “They all left, Mid’s here, she’s packing your stuff upstairs, will you please get up!?” I’m still tired and confused “We’re going to Hawaii? Tonight?” “Not if you don’t get up we’re not……” Fuck. We’re going to Hawaii. TONIGHT.