Three weeks later…
“Looks like we’ve got ourselves another successful year, boys!” Phil said as he came between Ari and I, throwing his arms over each of our shoulders, hugging us tight.
“Damn straight!” I replied with a smile, walking through the doors of the press room as Phil still hung his arms around me.
“Six noms, my boy!” Phil said as he turned to smile at me, squeezing my neck between his forearm.
I couldn’t help but to smile to myself. I was genuinely happy. It had been a longyear and now all the effort we’d put into everything was finally paying off and quite frankly, I was proud.
“I believe that calls for some celebration!” I replied with another goofy grin. We walked out the side doors, coming to be met by a moderately sized sea of paparazzi. I smiled at the cameras, waving at them as I showed my pride in my accomplishments.
We kept walking until we got into a black SUV, pulling out of the parking lot. I glanced out the window as we made our way through the darkening LA streets, my mind buzzing with excitement. I shook my head with a smile, looking down into my lap.
I stared at my hands as I still tried to take everything in. I flipped my wrists over so that I was staring at the back of each hand. The scars on the back of my knuckles were finally beginning to fade back. I let out a small sigh. I felt so great. The past couple of weeks my life turned around drastically, and I loved it. I felt so much better than I did a month ago.
I continued to smile to myself as we pulled up to a different parking lot. We got out of the vehicle as we made our way up to the doors of the club. The place was reserved for the evening, following from the time after the nominations concert. Once again, there were paparazzi waiting by the entrance, but I paid no attention to a few rude comments other than smiling back at them.
I followed Phil as he walked through the people, stopping to greet and congratulate several other artists. We chatted for a bit before I offered to grab Phil and Ari some drinks from the bar.
As I held their glasses and mine in my hands, I carefully turned from the bar, trying not to spill them.
“Oh my god, I’m sorry!” A woman’s voice rang out as she nearly toppled over my body.
I quickly saved the glasses from spilling before I looked up to see who it was. Apologetic brown eyes stared at my hands as I struggled to hold the three glasses.Woah, I’ve never seen her before, I thought as I scanned my eyes over her dark brunette hair.
“My apologies,” she said with a small smile, shrugging her shoulders.
“No, really, it’s fine,” I said as I placed the glasses back on the bar, unable to hold them.
“Oh,” she said, glancing up at my face suddenly. “You’re Bruno Mars, right?”
I nodded my head with a small smile. “Mhmm.”
“Congratulations tonight,” she said with the same sweet smile. “That’s pretty amazing.”
I felt my lips turn upwards into a brighter smile. “Thank you very much,” I replied as I nodded my head at her, wondering who she was. “And who might you be?” I asked as I raised an eyebrow towards her. “I don’t believe I’ve seen you around.”
“I tend to space that bit out sometimes,” she said with a small laugh as she rolled her eyes at herself. “I’m Nadine Woods,” She stated as she took my hand, shaking it. “I’m just—starting to work on with my label,” she said as she shrugged her shoulders lazily.
“Ahh,” I said with another smile. She slightly blushed, looking down as two dimples appeared on either sides of her mouth. “That would explain why I haven’t seen your face around too much.”
A small shout from a few feet away drew Nadine’s attention from me as her friend called out her name. “Well it was nice meeting you,” She said as she turned her head back to face me. “And sorry about that again,” She added as she glanced at the drinks sitting at the bar.
I shook my head, “No problem,” I said, reassuring her that it really wasn’t even a big deal. “I’d love to see you around again sometime,” I smiled as I flirted with her.
“Yeah,” She said as she took out her phone, glancing down at it for a moment. “Maybe when there’s a better time to talk?”
“Here,” I said, gently taking the phone from her small hands, putting my number into it. “Anytime is fine for me,” I added with a wink, handing it back to her as she smiled once more, putting it into her pocket.
I heaved a heavy sigh as I plopped down onto my sofa, flipping the vacuum to its upright position. Glad I’ve finally got that done, I thought as I stared at the perfectly clean carpet of my living room, slightly proud of myself.
I sat for a few minutes as I relaxed from cleaning before I got back up again. Grabbing my shoes from the floor, I walked down the hallway, singing along to Adele’s “Someone Like You” as it blasted on the radio through my speakers.
Chucking them into my closet, I pulled out my phone from my pocket, seeing a text message from Ally:
You still considering working with Jameson? Apparently he’s called your office several times today.
I rolled my eyes at the message as I replied with a no. I hadn’t even technicallyspoken to him since that night we’d met up at the bar. I glanced up from my phone as I remembered a few things, glancing down the hallway that led to my door, knowing there were a few small bloodstains that would never come out.
The sound of the radio brought me out of my trance as the male host’s voice echoed through my apartment. “And there you have it with Adele’s ‘Someone Like You’!” He said in a perky voice, causing me to roll my eyes at his enthusiasm. “Up next we’ve got the latest from Bruno Mars!”
Ugh, I thought as I began walking over to the radio. I’m getting sick of this ‘It Will Rain’ song. They play it 24/7. Just as I reached for the dial, I paused, hearing a strange melody coming from the speakers.
I listened as a tune I didn’t recognize came into play, making me stop and actually listen. I shook my head as I somehow swore I’ve heard that melody before. It sound so familiar, I thought as a scrunched my forehead, thinking.
And as memories poured from my brain, I felt my hand drop completely from the dial. I could almost hear his voice as he hummed the exact same melody into my ears as he held me tightly in bed, calming me after breaking down over his sudden change in attitude.
I walked over to a chair in a haze, flopping down into it as the song progressed. Lyrics I have never heard before poured through his voice in a happy, lovey matter. I shook my head over and over again, thoroughly surprised.
I analyzed every word that flowed along with the beat. And as much as I tried to deny it to myself, I couldn’t. That’s me, I thought as I repeatedly shook my head.He’s talking about me.
I bit my fingernails as I continued to listen, completely shocked that he ever released this. That’s what he told me about, I thought as I remembered his words:Give me a month and you won’t be disappointed.
Well sure as hell I know I’m pretty disappointed, I thought as I suddenly felt angry. I stood up, walking back over to the radio, shutting it off as the song reached the bridge. I can’t believe he actually released that, I thought as I made my round about the house, picking up random things to be put away. After all of that, and then he acts like things are fine by putting another lovely-dovey happy song out.
I don’t even want that, I continued to think. It’s not fair to me. Everyone else in the fucking world is going to know that song’s about me. I get enough people claiming I did shit to him, I thought as I remembered reading several articles on the ‘rumored’ break-up. Several ‘sources’ claimed I’d been the one who ruined everything. It made me mad; people were actually swayed enough to believe in it, which resulted in more than enough angry mails or tweets directed at me. I hated it.
Ugh, he’s never going to go away, I thought as I chucked some clothes into my hamper with a slight force. Even when I think he’s gone, oh, what do you know?! Something new comes back to slap me in the face.
I finally fell down onto my bed, letting out an annoyed groan into my pillow as I clenched my fists.
“Ugh, do you ever think of those people you just want to punch?” I groaned as I chucked my empty Starbuck’s cup into a garbage as Ally and I walked into the offices.
“I don’t know…” Ally replied with a shrug, giving me an odd look. “Are you alright?” She asked, sounding slightly concerned.
I shook my head as I walked down a hallway, stepping into my office as she followed behind me. “I’m just mad,” I stated as I threw my bag down at the ground.
“I think the word hostile is more appropriate,” Ally said with an eye roll. “Seriously though, what’s got you this time?”
I sat down at my desk, opening a tab on the internet. “This,” I said as I pulled up a YouTube video of the song I just heard yesterday. I turned the screen around towards her as I turned the volume up, resting my chin in my hands.
“…Well shit,” Ally said as the song finished, raising both her eyebrows as she glanced at me. “That really surprises me.”
I rolled my eyes. “You think?” I let out a small groan as I bit my cheeks in thought. “Why does this bother me so much?” I pondered, wondering why it seemed such a big deal.
Ally shrugged her shoulders as she flopped down into a chair opposite from me. “Maybe because it’s so personal? I know that’d bother me…”
“Yeah,” I said as I shook my head in confusion, “but it’s not fair to me. That shouldn’t even be legal without my consent.”
“Yeah but it’s not like your name’s in it.”
I sent a glare towards Ally. Thanks for your support, I thought as I rolled my eyes. “It might as well be. It basically screams ‘THIS IS ABIGAIL MIDLEY’” I said in a loud voice, my anger slightly taking over.
Ally let herself laugh at my expression, not trying to hide her amusement. “I still think it’s a cute song,” she said with a small smile.
“Oh my god, get out,” I said in an annoyed tone, telling her to leave me alone. “You’re not helping.”
She simply smiled as she stood up, walking to the door. “I’m sorry Abbs,” She said, her face turning sympathetic suddenly. “But his personality shouldn’t reflect your take on his music,” she added before walking through the doorway before I had a chance to protest.
I sat in thought for a moment before my phone rang, bringing me out of my trance. “Hello?” I asked as I answered the phone, leaning back in my chair.
“Abigail!” I recognized the voice of Brad Strong. I’d known him for several years now from his work as a television producer in LA. We’d been relatively close friends through several events.
“Oh hey!” I said with a smile, glad to hear from him in several months.
“How’ve you been?” He asked in the usually happy voice he always carried on.
I shrugged my shoulders, clicking a pen in my left hand. “I’ve been alright. And you?”
“I haven’t been too shabby myself,” he said with a small chuckle. “Say,” he continued, sounding his tone changing slightly. “I’ll get right down to business with this,” he said with a small laugh. “But I’m working as an executive producer for the upcoming Peoples’ Choice awards in January,” he said in an almost proud tone, “and we’re really needing some presenters, and I’d love for you to be a part of it.”
I bit my lip, glancing curiously down at the pen I held. “The Peoples’ Choice Awards?” I asked, slightly pondering it. “I’m not sure I’m one for presenting,” I said with a tiny laugh. “That’s why I don’t do television.”
“I know,” he said with a small sigh. “But this year we’re looking for some diversity. You know your stuff well, and we need someone for the music categories.”
“Uhh,” I said as I bit my lip still, not knowing what to say. “Which one?” I asked cautiously, wanting to avoid anything that would cause frenzy with the media.
“Don’t worry,” he said with a small sigh, knowing what was on my mind. “It’s for the best female artist.”
I took a small breath in, thinking for a moment before letting it out in a sigh. “I suppose I could do it,” I said, giving in.
“Great, Abigail!” Brad replied in a cheerful manner. “I’ll get all the details sent to you soon!”
I smiled back into her cheerful eyes, watching as she glanced down at her dinner plate with a shy expression.
“You’re very intimidating, Bruno Mars,” Nadine said as she glanced up at me in a graceful manner.
I winked back at her as she blushed, taking a sip of my wine. “I get that a lot,” I said as I turned my eyes up to look at the ceiling dramatically before laughing.
She rolled her eyes as she finished off the rest of her water. “I’m sure you do,” she said with a laugh, shaking her head.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked as I kept the same smile on my face. I watched as she tried to keep a straight face, shaking her head as she looked down.
“I think you’re smart enough to figure that out on your own,” she finally replied, daring to look back up at me.
“And what if I’m not?” I asked in a smaller tone, leaning over the table slightly.
She shrugged her shoulders again, readjusting the napkin on her lap. “Then it wouldn’t be worth explaining in the first place,” she stated smartly, tilting her head with a smirk at me.
I smiled as I glanced at her flawless face, opening my mouth to speak just as the waiter came back to the table, putting the bill in the center of the table. We both grew silent as he picked up our empty plates, simply looking at each other with unspoken smiles.
“No thank you,” I said as I saw her hand reaching for the bill. I quickly took it before her hand reached it, causing her to raise her eyebrow at me.
“I’d just like to see how much it cost,” she said sweetly.
I shook my head as I glanced down at it, taking out my wallet. “Rule number one while taking a woman to dinner is that you never let her see the bill,” I said as I placed several bills on the table.
“According to which guidelines?” She asked suspiciously.
“Mine,” I said with a smile, putting my hat back on my head as I stood up from the table.
She followed my lead, standing up from her spot as well. I placed my hand on her lower back as I led her out of the busy restaurant, stepping out into the dark streets.
Several paparazzi stood near the doors when I stepped out, flashes from their cameras blinding me. I simply smiled at them, ignoring their questions as I raised a hand in a wave.
“And what’s rule number two?” She asked as we stepped away from the paparazzi.
“Rule number two is I don’t let you go home alone,” I replied with a wink as I turned to her, causing her lips to break out into the tiniest smile.
I stepped into the terminal of the Sea-Tac Airport, feeling an immediate rush of cooler air within the first breath I took in. I was tired as shit, but I still smiled at the thought that I was home. Finally.
I swung my carryon bag over my shoulders, lazily walking through the surprisingly crowded airport for being nearly midnight. Well I suppose it’s the holiday season, I thought as I weaved my way through the people, trying to make it to baggage claim.
Although there was still just below two weeks until Christmas, I was already ready to be home. I had a very long vacation planned, and I needed it. It had been over a year since I had been back home. With the rise in work from the past months, I found it harder to take off time to come and visit all of my extended family. Not to mention I hadn’t even seen my brother for God knows how long..
And now seemed the best time more than ever to be taking a break. I was going to take advantage of it.
I continued to walk until I arrived at the appointed area, still squeezing my way through the mounds of people as I tried to reach the baggage claim area. I eventually got there, grabbing my suitcase from the revolving belt and heading to the northern doors where my parents said they’d pick me up at.
There were less people the closer I got to the main doorways, making walking much easier. I looked out the windows as I passed them by, seeing there was a good two inches of snow on the ground. I smiled to myself, knowing it’d been a while since I’d seen snow.
I stepped through the automatic doors, pausing on the sidewalk as I glanced down to the left, trying to see if I recognized my parents’ car.
“Abigail!” I heard an excited voice ring out.
I turned to the opposite way from where I was facing, seeing my bright-eyed father walking towards me with my mother close behind, both of whom had cheesy smiles on.
I smirked back as I began walking towards them. It was good to be home.
I lounged back onto a chair in my living room as I strummed against a ukulele, tipping my head up to stare at the ceiling through my sunglasses. Laughter filled around me as everyone else conversed on random topics, enjoying themselves.
I hummed quietly to myself, drifting off into my own world until I heard a small whisper next to me.
“Bruno?” It was Nadine’s voice that broke my concentration, causing me to look back down to her.
She gave me a strange look before taking the sunglasses off my eyes, laughing as she tossed them to a side table. “I don’t think you’ll be seeing much sun in December,” she said as she slightly shook her head.
“It is the sunshine state,” I said as I scanned everyone in front of me, drifting off once more.
I heard Nadine try to suppress a laugh. “Bruno, that’s Florida,” she said as she stared at me as if I were slightly crazy.
I tipped my head back, turning to face her with a smirk. “Don’t make me look stupid,” I said as I gently tapped her on the nose, giving her a tiny wink.
We all decided to have one more get-together before the Holidays; a sort of a Christmas party, so to speak. Main events like this always ended up at my place—not that I minded or anything. It just tended to be a bit overwhelming, especially following the weeks of chaos I’d experienced recently.
I looked back from Nadine to the crowded living room, scanning from Jason all the way to Eric, all who seemed to be having a good time. I bit my lips back as I continued to strum on the ukulele, nodding my head as I inspected everyone, zoning out into the music once more.
A few hours later, I stood in the kitchen as nearly everyone left, picking at some leftover food that hadn’t been eaten by everyone already. I glanced down the hallway towards the living room, seeing the back of Nadine as she chatted with Urbana, the two of them seemingly getting along fine.
“Hey I think we’re just about ready to get going too,” Eric said as he walked into the kitchen, holding his sleeping son.
I nodded my head, touching my nephew’s small fingers as I smiled at him. Eric grew quiet for a moment as he shuffled his feet slightly, as if thinking of something to say.
“So—uh what exactly are you planning for Christmas?” He asked in a nervous voice, glancing down at me.
I looked up to his face, seeing the concern in his eyes. “Don’t worry,” I said with a tiny smile. “I’m going back home too, so you don’t have to worry about me.” I could tell he still felt as though he needed to watch me. I was a mess. And if he hadn’t been there to watch me, I’d probably be in a shittier place than I was now.
He really was a good brother.
So I suppose I understood his concern, especially from where I ended up getting myself the past few times I’d been in public.
He nodded his head once as he thought for a moment. “Alright then,” he said as he began walking towards the hallway, “I’ll talk to you soon then.” He smiled once before saying goodbye, leaving me to myself in the kitchen.
My moment of quiet lasted only for a few minutes before Brandon walked into the kitchen.
“So you’re still sure about doing it?” He asked as he slapped his hands down on the counter opposite from me.
I nodded my head, taking a grape from a tray and putting it in my mouth. “I’m good this time,” I said as I swallowed, looking over to him. “And I swear I’m just BS-ing.”
He nodded his head in the same matter that Eric did only minutes ago. He’d mentioned that the directors of the Peoples’ Choice Awards had asked if we could perform the night of the event, but he seemed skeptical from everything that had been happening recently. I assured him that by that point I would be fully back on track and up and ready for everything. Which was true; I seemed and felt great.
“Alrighty,” he said as he smiled, still not hiding his concern. “But there’s one more thing that I’ve got to drop on you, just so you have a head’s up of it,” he said as he ran a stressful hand over his tired face.
I stood up from leaning on the counter, giving him a questioning look at what he meant. “—Yeah?” I asked cautiously, watching as he somewhat struggled to form the words.
“Abigail is going to be presenting that night as well,” he said as he finally glanced back over to me.
I stopped for a moment, his words catching me off guard. It had been a long time since her name popped up in a conversation. It felt weird. I stared off into space as my mind drifted, a sad wave of guilt coming over me as I pictured her face. I slowly shook my head. “No, that’s fine,” I said as I stared at the tray of food in front of me, not blinking.
“You sure?” He asked, sounding as if I didn’t convince him very well. “We can always cancel.”
I shook my head, still staring. “I’ll be fine,” I said, reaching my hand down to nervously scratch at an imperfection of the granite counter top.
Abigail, I thought as I softly shook my head. It’s been quite a while since I even remembered her. I felt strange when I pictured her, memories flooding back into my head as if it were yesterday. There was something odd about the way I felt when I thought of her. Something that I’ve never really felt like before, about any of my ex’s.
I felt my knuckles tighten as I scratched the counter harder. We weren’t even together for that long, but it felt as though we’d been dating for years, not months. I couldn’t explain why or what I felt like about her.
A small ping of pain ached deep in my chest as I stared forwards. And I think I’ve figured out what it is I’m feeling, I thought as I bit the insides of my cheeks. Guilt.
Or would I describe it as love?
I reallyyyy like this one…
I flipped through the TV, casually relaxed on the sofa, trying to find something decent to watch. I let out a bored sigh, finding nothing interesting. Deciding I wouldn’t find any good movies on, I changed the receiver to the radio, knowing I wouldn’t find anything better at this late in the evening.
I heard the familiar tone of the Kiis FM jingle as I reached for my phone that buzzed in notification of a text from Phil. I stopped midway at looking to my phone to the sound of the radio host’s voice, drawing my attention away from my BlackBerry. “And now the latest from Bruno Mars…” I felt a small clench in my stomach when the beginning tune of the song began, causing my hand to stop on the keypad of my phone.
It was the first time that I had heard the song for myself on the radio; I’d avoided them ever since I released it, knowing I wouldn’t want to hear it. I stared at the radio receiver, taking in the song that at one point meant the world to me. Just months ago I thought things could never be any better, and I was right. Things were so much different now.
I’d been through hell and back this last fall, and was just starting to finally get my life back on track of how it should be. But the sound of that familiar tune playing in the background of my thoughts brought my mind all the way back to August, when everything felt so right.
Frustrated with myself, I grabbed the remote, turning off the radio completely. I couldn’t handle the sound of it any longer. It brought back far too many memories, both good and bad, but all that I wanted to move on from.
I got up from the couch, feeling a small headache beginning to set in. Walking to the kitchen, I grabbed a glass of water and Ibuprofen, tossing the pills into my mouth as I washed them down with water. I unnoticeably slammed the glass down on the counter, resting both hands on the edge, leaning my head over.
My mind kept replaying back to earlier in the evening, just before Brandon left. A couple of hours ago I stood in this same position, the exact same thoughts running through my head as from the second he mentioned her name. Why was I feeling like this? I shouldn’t be thinking of her. I’m with Nadine now.
I don’t know how long it was I stood there for, but I eventually heard movement in the house. I felt two slim arms wrap around my stomach from behind, feeling a head rest itself on my shoulder.
“Is everything alright?” I heard Nadine ask softly in my ear.
I nodded my head, still facing opposite from her. “Just a headache.” I lied with a shrug.
“Do you need to lie down or something?” She asked, giving me a soft hug from behind. I turned around to face her, giving her a soft smile. I shook my head again. “Nah, I’m just stressed is all.”
“Music?” She said with a raised eyebrow and a tiny smile.
“Yeah, I guess you could say that.” I replied, wrapping my arms around her waist as I set my head on her shoulder. That’s exactly what I told Abigail too. Just music problems.
“You’ve been pretty busy,” She said in my ear, gently touching my back. “Even with this break, you don’t seem to be relaxed too much.”
I nodded my head in agreement. “I know; I’m ready to go home. I really need it.”
She shrugged her shoulders before nodding her head. “It may be awhile until I see you next,” she said as she glanced up at my face.
I leaned back from her, seeing a bit of a sad look on her face. I grabbed her chin, giving her a reassuring smile. “I know, I’ll be gone for a few weeks,” I said, gently touching her cheek. “But I’m here now, so we might as well make the best of it as we can.” I leaned into her, kissing her softly on her lips.
She wrapped her arms around my waist, not my neck like Abby used to do. I never noticed the difference in touch until now; even from the way she pressed her body against mine was different. I continued to kiss her, running my hands through her chestnut hair that was much shorter than Abby’s light brunette hair. I tried to shake the thoughts, but I kept picturing Abby in my mind. This never happened. Something wasn’t the same as it usually was when I was with Nadine. I neverthought about Abby. Until now.
I needed to get my mind off of this. It was driving me insane. I reached my arms down, grabbing and lifting Nadine from the ground, her legs wrapping around my waist. I carried her down the hall in a blinded manner, making my way up the stairs and successfully landing in the bedroom.
I set her down on the bed, still standing as I slowly began to lean on her. I hesitated as I reached my arms down to rest on either side of her on the bed, my mind thinking twice again. I tried to relax myself, but I couldn’t get myself to do it. I shook my head, pulling back from her lips. This doesn’t feel right.
“I’m sorry,” I said, shaking my head. “I just have too much on my mind.” I took my hat off, scratching my head in thought. Nadine looked up at me, a bit concerned, but didn’t say anything. She nodded, motioning for me to sit down.
Taking a spot next to her on the bed, I felt her sit behind me, giving me a soft rub on my left shoulder. “I understand.” She said with a small smile, leaving me to my thoughts as she got up, going to the bathroom.
I woke up to my thoughts suddenly overwhelming my sleep, causing me to feel antsy. I flicked open my eyes, coming face-to-face with a peaceful looking Nadine, deep in sleep. Rolling over to my side, I looked at the clock, seeing it was well past three am. Being unable to handle laying down any more, I got up from the bed, walking over to the two glass doors on the opposite side of my room.
Opening them, I stepped out onto the balcony that overlooked the hillside in which my house resided. I glanced at the lights of nighttime LA; the moon and stars shining brightly above. I propped my elbows on the railing, staring off, deep in my thoughts.
I felt Nadine’s arms around my body a few minutes later, sharing my view of the city. She stood for a few moments, not saying a word. She let out a deep breath a while later, her voice gentle as she spoke. “You still love her, don’t you?” She asked softly in my ear.
Her words caught me slightly off guard, causing me to turn my head to face her. “What are you talking about?” I asked, seeing her eyes looking straight back into mine.
“Abigail,” She replied in the same voice. “I can tell you’re thinking about her,” she spoke slowly and in a calm tone. “You never say anything, but I can tell by the look in your eyes that whenever something reminds you, you’re thinking about her.”
Her words pierced my skull, reading every thought on my current mindset. I knewthat somewhere I still loved Abby, but I never really accepted the thought that I wasn’t over her. I was silent, contemplating whether or not I should tell Nadine the truth. I eventually forced myself to nod my head. “Yeah,” I said in a sleepy-sounding voice. “I think I do.” I spoke honestly; there was no way I could try to deny it now. I still loved her.
She nodded her head, still looking at me. “Go find her,” She said, drawing my decreased attention back to her. I gave her a strange look, not expecting these words to come out of her mouth. “Make things right with her. It’s obvious you’re not happy with yourself, and I’m only holding you back from fixing things between you two.” I listened intently, my brain trying to tell me that my ears were lying to me.
“They say fight for the one person who means the most to you; and you’re not going to move on unless you at least know that you’ve tried,” She continued, keeping the same steady pace. I bit my lips back, trying to make sense of her words.
Nadine was silent for a moment as I took in her words, still confused. She shifted her body to the side of me in a calm manner. “I really hope things work out for you two,” She said sincerely, leaning in closer to my face.
“Abby seems like a real sweetheart.” She smiled softly, but not sadly as she leaned in, her lips touching my cheek. She kissed me softly for a second before pulling back, leaning her body away from mine.
I turned around to face her, slowly nodding my head. I’ve never had a woman break up with me, telling me to get back with my ex. And never have I been broken up with and actually not felt any sorrow. It was just unusual. I looked over as Nadine smiled one last time, taking a few steps backwards as she stepped into my bedroom from the balcony.
“I’ll see you around, Bruno.” She said with a wink, bending down to grab a bag of hers. She proceeded in walking out the door, disappearing from my sight as I was left to just myself and the now millions of thoughts swarming my mind.
What the hell just happened?
Christmas passed by fairly quickly being as I spent some much needed time in Hawaii. I was embraced by my caring (and quite frankly concerned) sisters and mother from the moment I set foot on the island. The days went by fairly quickly, and before I knew it, I was back home in Los Angeles.
And although I was celebrating New Year’s at my brother’s place tonight, I really didn’t mind the fact that I wasn’t going out. In fact, I believe it was the first time in several years that I actually kept a calm New Years. I enjoyed spending time with my family; that is, the relatives that weren’t currently living back in Hawaii.
Aside from family, Phil and Ryan were the only two who could make it to the celebration. We all stood crowding in the loud living room as the final minutes of 2011 drew to a close. I smiled a genuine smile; I was excited for the New Year. And I promised myself I would close in the end of next year with a much better story than I had currently.
But as I stood staring at the rerun of the ball drop in Time’s Square on TV, I wondered where I would find myself this next year. Things have got to be looking better than they have been, I thought as I squeezed my glass of champagne in hand. And I’m going to do everything in my ability to put everything in the past couple of months behind me. For good this time.
A loud holler filled the room as Eric attempted to catch everyone’s attention that there were currently ten seconds until midnight. A small hush then took over as everyone turned their attention to the flat screen television, smiling eagerly as the large lighted ball descended.
10, 9, 8, 7…
I wondered where my life would be heading in a month’s time. Would I be doing good? Would I be doing great? Would I be ready to start touring and producing again?
…6, 5, 4,
I began to raise my glass as a smile crept up on my face. 2012, what will you bring to me? I thought as I pondered further on my mentally stated resolutions.
I took a deep breath, closing my eyes slowly. “One,” I softly mumbled under my breath as everyone clapped and cheered around me. I smirked towards Phil as he winked back at me, both of us tossing our drinks back at the same time.
And as I threw my head backwards towards the ceiling, the cold, tingly drink easing down my throat, my mind suddenly changed courses from my previous thoughts.
I wonder where Abby is right now…
“Happy New Year!” my family and close relatives cheered out as the clock struck midnight. I smiled and cheered along with them, eager for the New Year.
I set my wine glass down on a table as I finally took a deep breath, the thought that it was a different year beginning to settle in.
Wow, I thought as I shook my head, what an insane year.
Thinking back to one year ago, I never would have thought that I’d end up being where I am now. So many great things brought me where I am now. 365 days ago, I had not been nearly as successful in my career as I was now, and neither would I have believed to ever be as fortunate as I am.
If someone were to tell me everything that was going to happen in 2011 last New Year’s, I never would have believed a word they said. Everything from professional to personal experience proved to make this year memorable.
And there were still some pretty shitty things, I thought as I felt my happy expression fall slightly. I really shouldn’t be thinking about this all the time, I thought as I shook my head, trying to rid my mind of those sort of thoughts.
“Everything alright?” I heard my older brother ask as he walked towards me, his smile slightly fading at my expression. “You don’t look too happy for bringing in the New Year,” he said as he raised a curious eyebrow towards me.
I shook my head, standing up straighter. “I’m fine,” I said with a smile, glancing over to him. “I’m just…thinking, is all.”
“Hey,” he said, giving me the usual big brother look he’s always had. “It’s a new year now,” he said as if reading my mind. “Don’t be thinking about what hashappened; think about all the great things that are going to happen.” He let out a wink as he smiled at me.
I smiled back, nodding my head. “I suppose you’re right,” I said with a shrug. “Thanks,” I added, returning his hug as he reached his arms out in front of me.
“I’m real proud of you, Abbs,” He said with a smile as he drew back. “Everything you’ve worked for, you deserve.”